Today was a rollercoaster. May or may not have had my heartbroken. I don’t know yet. I’m kind of in shock if I’m going to be honest. I’m hurting in ways and I don’t know why I am.
So the day started out pretty good actually. I got to talk to my friend (check out last piece) , and I was really enjoying it. I was smiling almost all day.
Approximately 8:00 pm today, I got a text. From my friend. His name is Waffles. But now I can’t even say it or loud. Anyways he surprised me today by telling me he was in Hawaii! He paid for him and his family to go and stay for until his parents want to leave. I thought that was so sweet. But now I’m going to tell you the exact exchanging of words.
So whatcha up to in Hawaii?
Sleeping right now
Oh sorry!
Your good I’m going swimming with a girl I just met.
A girl I met. That phrase caused me in the blink of an eye to go from a smiling ray of sunshine if I do say myself, to someone who can’t even force themselves to smile. As I’m writing this I’m having trouble focusing, or even finding the right words to even say. I’m kind of in shock. Just as I was starting to think I liked him too.
I am really happy for him though. And very proud. So don’t get me wrong when I say I’m still very sad. I don’t want to say heartbroken but I felt like crying all the way home. Then I had multiple things come up so I couldn’t go home so I had to sit through another hour and a half of not crying. It was tough but I’m here and that’s all I can say.
People recently have been asking me how I’m doing. And I’m going to be honest. I don’t know how to answer that anymore. I don’t know if I’m good, or fine, or horrible. It could be any of the above, and it is almost constantly changing.
That’s why, even though I’m not normally a person to search for a moral, clinging on to the semblance that there has to be some meaning of good behind the bad, I would like to leave you with something this time, if anybody is reading this.
First off, if you like someone, let them know how you feel. Now I know this can be hard and seem impossible, believe me I’ve been there. Honestly I don’t know if I ever have confessed to a crush. But I am going to start trying to, and though I’m bad at taking my own advice, I want to encourage you to tell them. Therefore you can never watch your crush get snatched up by someone else. Please don’t let it happen to you.
Second off, I want to encourage you to maybe start a blog like this. I’m here because I need a place to keep my thoughts, and emotions. This helps me calm down when it comes to real life. This is why none of my friends know this site is mine, though I’m sure they’d recognize it in an instance, because some of what I say to you, dear reader, are things not even they know. So I thank you for allowing such anonymity.
Thank you, Farewell for now
Just a Lonely Traveler in the Night 